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Black Lamb

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Black Lamb was created to offer the discerning reader a stimulating selection of excellent original writing. Published monthly. (more)

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The best show ever

May 1st, 2007

BY WILLIAM BOGERT

arthurjean-copy.jpgA while ago I wrote about often having been asked who was the best I’d ever worked with, and the difficulty of giving a definitive answer. Less frequently I’m asked what was the best performance I’ve ever seen. That’s an easy one: Jean Arthur as Peter Pan.

Considering how well I remember details of that performance, it’s perhaps surprising that I can’t think of the year, but this is being written from Los Angeles and I don’t have access to my records in New York: suffice it to say that it was comfortably over half a century ago. A few years later there was another production, also a musical, with Mary Martin. It was very well received, and later done on television, and quite a lot of people remember it, and it suffered greatly (in my opinion) by comparison with the Arthur version.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Bogert | Link to this Entry

In and out of God’s ear

May 1st, 2007

BY LORENTZ LOSSIUS

St. Patrick’s Cathedral in Melbourne on a warm Sunday evening in Lent: the setting sun pours through the yellow-paned clerestory windows and along the tall stone transept. The aureal glow trickles over the heads of a few dozen faithful attendants, tiny motionless figures far down in the dark valley of the nave. Up here on the choir platform twelve of us are singing the offertory motet, Ecce quomodo, moritur justus. It reverberates and swells down the building and eddies back toward us heavily. Gesualdo’s music is a dark sky through which opposing armies of moist air, one warmed by grace, the other chilled in mortal fear, meet above the field. The collision drags the cold under. A spiral of cloud plunges earthward, as, though inverted on different scales of time and weight, the edge of one continent is said to plunge under the other, melting into the black heat of the earth as the other rears up to form ice-catching mountains above it. Et erit in pace, memoria ejus. A chord of light spears Gesualdo’s turbulent, imploring gloom. The hell-heaven of that murdering, penitent prince is made still for as long as the twelve of us can sustain our slow, controlled exhalation.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Lossius | Link to this Entry

How hot was it?

May 1st, 2007

BY ROD FERRANDINO

Setting for tragedy:
South Florida Fairground
West Palm Beach
Most of January, 2007

And the question is when, oh when, will this bleeping show ever end? Is that possibly a speck of light at the end of this almost forever tunnel?

It has been a demoralizing seventeen-day eternity, an energy-sapping, bankroll-depleting, brain-sucking disaster. Not just a garden variety, never-to-repeat, “rear-view-mirror” weekend show, a plentiful type in any forty-four-show year, but, like a hundred-year storm, one for the ages. The “Flood of Ought-seven,” or “Plague,” or “Famine,” maybe a “Drought.” Pick your curse.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Ferrandino | Link to this Entry

Invitation to stray

May 1st, 2007

BY GILLIAN WILCE

londoncab-copy.jpgOne of the all-time best-known pieces of advice to tourists visiting London was Gerard Hoffnung’s “Try the famous echo in the British Museum Reading Room.” It was, of course, tongue in cheek — a winning entry in the New Statesman’s weekly competition. Being involved with this competition — including moonlighting as one of the many pseudonymous characters (Ms. de Meaner, perhaps) who inhabited the mythic “Comp. Complex” and set and judged the competitions — was one of the jolliest aspects of working at the New Statesman. Misleading advice for tourists was a favorite and was repeated several times over the years, though none of the results ever quite matched the brilliant succinctness of Mr. Hoffnung’s entry. Another highlight, also before my time (which was in the 1980s), was the Graham Greene parody competition, won by a new name in competition annals, which turned out to be a pseudonym for — yes, Graham Greene himself. I also remember with fondness a competition to provide gnomic sounding but outstandingly meaningless proverbs, like the solemn dictum: ‘“He digs deepest who deepest digs.”’

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Wilce | Link to this Entry

Plagiarism

May 1st, 2007

BY TOBY TOMPKINS

plagiarize vt: to steal and pass off as one’s own (the ideas or words of another) ~ vi: to present as one’s own an idea or product derived from an existing source”
Webster’s Seventh New Collegiate Dictionary

The battered old dictionary was my wife’s when she was in high school, and I still consult it when I want quick definitions, rather than the windy ones in my Shorter OED. But its blunt, unequivocal definition of “plagiarize” certainly belongs to a simpler, perhaps more innocent era, before stealing became “attribution” and the lawyers began to fatten their wallets on copyright cases involving the Internet.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Tompkins | Link to this Entry

Carpe diem

May 1st, 2007

BY DAVID MACLAINE

frenchhorn-copy.jpgIt had been a bad late February. Flu had swept through the household, and just when my bout shifted from acute to lingering misery, my main computer suddenly failed. The news from the repair shop was grim: lose weeks of writing, all my financial records, and assorted other goodies, or pay exorbitant amounts to retrieve data. It was a problem that needed urgent attention, but instead of addressing it, I was obliged to spend the first day of the week downtown at the county courthouse. Who knew it would turn out to be my best day in months?

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Maclaine | Link to this Entry

Dumb jocks?

May 1st, 2007

bballmortarboard-copy.jpgBY DAN PETERSON

The “dumb jock” stereotype has existed for as long as I can remember and I’m seventy-one and started coaching basketball at age fifteen. Are there some dumb jocks? Of course. But I think the subject has to be examined from several points of view and only after setting down some premises. Blanket statements or percentages or numbers are not going to do the trick. Where to start?

Let’s take American women. I live in Italy, and when Italian (and European) women go to the USA, they are amazed at what they perceive as a lack of true femininity in American women. They will say, “Your women have physical beauty in many cases but they lack sophistication.” Just another way of saying someone has athletic talent but does not have intellectual training.

Staying with women for a moment, there is a place in New York City that teaches a course called The French Woman, to teach American women this charm and sophistication. Its ads say, “The French woman doesn’t walk, she glides.” So, the U.S. women in NYC go to study this. My wife is half-French, so I tell her, “Hey, are you going to stop gliding around or what?” She loves this.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Peterson | Link to this Entry

Life goes on

May 1st, 2007

BY ELIZABETH HART

longneckedwoman-copy.jpgI finally got a trip in an ambulance. I’d had relatively minor trips last year: a hamstring torn while falling over the dog in the middle of the night (he’s still having nightmares), a sprained ankle dodging the sudden rise of a sprinkler head (hey, it was the biggest, scariest one on our property), a twisted knee and another ankle sprained while fainting at the scene of a total stranger’s motorcycle accident — but I’d never been in an ambulance. ’Til now.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Hart | Link to this Entry

Study in scarlet

May 1st, 2007

fatgirl-copy.jpgBY DEAN SUESS

I have been working for some time on the outline of a novella, a study in scarlet as it were, of the dismal lives of people fascinated by, surrounded by, intrigued by, even bound by the actions of inmates in the prison system and those released, now living as ex-cons. What in God’s name makes “normal” people, whose self-preservation instincts should be shrieking “Run away! Run away!” seek out cons, insinuate themselves into their lives, accept substantial damage at their hands and through their machinations, and further ingratiate themselves in most humiliating and co-dependent ways — what makes these “normal” people tick?

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: Suess | Link to this Entry

Chaper Eighteen: JJ helps with the fire drill

May 1st, 2007

BY CATE GARRISON

Despite the drama occasioned by our dog JJ’s consumption of our Mercedes’ innards, it wasn’t long before most of my nearest and dearest settled back into their old ways. That is to say, my husband began to spend most of his time away from home again, apparently at work. My sons continued their lives of school, friends, homework, and video games, and, increasingly, inhaled the contents of the fridge, which due to JJ’s unwillingness to remain alone were increasingly difficult to replace. Handy Jack, therefore, continued to provide his regular services of odd-job man, dog sitter and walker, and general family companion. True, after falling into his arms over the car-eating fiasco (an experience that had provoked the odd dormant emotion), I had wondered about sacking him. But he was literally our meal ticket. Though my husband’s salary provided the funds, Handy Jack’s presence enabled me to go out and buy groceries. All in all, he was too useful, too affable, too necessary to us all for me to make the break.

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Posted by: The Editors
Category: The JJ Chronicles, Garrison | Link to this Entry

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