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Black Lamb

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Now in its 14th year of publication, this magazine was created to offer the discerning reader a stimulating selection of excellent original writing. Black Lamb Review is a literate rather than a literary publication. Regular columns by writers in a variety of geographic locations and vocations are supplemented by features, reviews, articles on books and authors, and a selection of “departments,” including an acerbic advice column and a lamb recipe.

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Gimme That Wine

November 1st, 2006

My wife got tired a’ me runnin ’round,
so she tried to keep me home;
Well, she broke my nose and hid my clothes,
but I continued to roam.
Then she finally hit my weak spot —
threatened to throw my bottle out.
Well, from the basement to the rooftop,
everybody could hear me shout:

Chorus
Gimme that wine (Unhand that bottle) (3 times)
’Cause I can’t cut loose without my juice.
Gotta have hot lucy when I go walkin’ y’know.

Well, one day while crossin the avenue,
a big car knocked me down.
While I was stretched out tyin’ up traffic,
crowds came from blocks around
Now the po-lice were searchin’ my pockets,
before they sent me to the funeral parlor,
But when one o’ those cops took my bottle, Jack,
I jumped straight up and commenced to holler:

Chorus
Gimme that wine (Unhand that bottle) (3 times)
’Cause I can’t get well without Muskatel.
I only drink for medicinal purposes anyway.

Well, now, one real dark and dreary night
as I was staggerin’ home t’ bed,
Well, a bandit jumped from the shadows
and put a blackjack ’side my head.
That cat took my watch, my ring, my money,
and I didn’t make a sound,
but when he reached an’ got my bottle,
you could hear me for blocks around:

Chorus
Gimme that wine (Unhand that bottle) (3 times)
Beat m’ head outta shape, but leave my grape.
Watch, ring and money ain’t nothin’ but don mess with my wine, Jim.

Well one day my house caught fire
while I was layin’ down sleepin’ off a nap
An’ when I woke up everything was burnin’
with a pop an’ a crackle an’ a snap.
Now the fireman chopped up my TV set
and tore my apartment apart,
But when he raised his axe to my bottle,
I screamed with all my heart:

Chorus
Gimme that wine (Unhand that bottle) (3 times)
So I can drink one toast before I roast.
No sense goin’ out half baked, might as well be all tore up.

You can take all those Hollywood glamor girls —
Lana Turner, Rita Hayworth, Bridget Bardot, n’ Lucille Ball,
and all them chicks an’ line ’em upside the wall
Put a gigantic jug beside ’em,
an’ tell me to take my choice.
Well, there’d be no doubt which one I chose,
the minute I raised my voice.

Chorus
Gimme that wine (Unhand that bottle) (3 times)
Well those chicks look fine, but I love my wine.
Now some folks like money, some like to dance and dine,
But I’ll be happy if you give me that wine.

—Jon Hendricks, recorded by Lambert, Hendricks & Ross, 1959

Posted by: The Editors
Category: All Smoking & Drinking Issue | Link to this Entry

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